Tommeh is not a Patriot. He's a twat.
TetleysTLDR: The summary
On Saturday, Tommy Robinson dragged his gammon circus back into London, puffing himself up with the boast that it would be the biggest rally the city had ever seen. It wasn’t. At best he pulled 110,000–150,000, nowhere near the 1–2 million who marched against the Iraq war, the 300,000 pro-Palestine marchers of 2023, or even anti-austerity protests that matched his numbers without the hate. For a man obsessed with spectacle, the optics were pathetic: he promised a tidal wave and delivered a puddle. Robinson wraps himself in the Union Jack and pretends to be a patriot, but he’s a career criminal, a race-baiting grifter bankrolled by the US alt-right and cheerleading Israel’s genocide in Gaza. He has never fought for jobs, housing, the NHS or workers’ rights—only for division. He’s no patriot, just a coward in a flag: a conman, a quisling, and a short-arsed fascist twat flogging hate for profit.
TetleysTLDR: The article
On Saturday, Tommy Robinson shuffled his sorry Gammon circus back into central London, declaring yet again that the capital’s streets somehow belong to him and his flag-draped hangers-on. What unfolded was depressingly familiar: a motley band of mainly middle-aged blokes bellowing recycled slogans, draped in plastic Union Jacks bought off EBay, with Robinson strutting about like a Poundland Mussolini. The atmosphere was less 'people’s uprising' and more stag-do gone wrong: all lager breath, misplaced patriotism and a seething undercurrent of hate. The police presence once again drained the tax payer, counter-protests smaller but louder and ordinary Londoners mostly looked on with the kind of weary disdain you reserve for an idiot shouting on the night bus. For all the noise Robinson generates online, on the ground he remains what he has always been: a professional agitator flogging resentment to an ever-shrinking audience.
Now this might have been his biggest effort ever, but in this he failed. The real comedy if you can stomach it was that Robinson’s boast in the run-up that this march would be the 'largest rally London has ever seen'. He fancied himself standing shoulder-to-shoulder with history, imagining that he’d summon hundreds of thousands into Trafalgar Square. Instead, estimates put the turnout somewhere between 110,000 and 150,000. Now this isn't insignificant, but it's nowhere near the historic demonstrations he pretends to rival. The Stop the War protest against the Iraq invasion in 2003 drew between 1 and 2 million people on the streets of London, dwarfing Robinson’s best efforts. Even the recent pro-Palestine march of November 2023 brought out 300,000, more than double his numbers, while the anti-austerity protests of 2015 matched or exceeded his tally without the toxic baggage. Some of these were not even covered by the media. For a man who thrives on size and spectacle, the optics were disastrous: he promised a tidal wave, delivered a puddle, and ended up looking ridiculous in the shadow of movements with real moral weight. His supposed 'silent majority' stayed silent and crucially, stayed home. Twat.
Tommeh's dickheads squaring up against the Police. A handful of arrests while pensioners sitting on the floor protesting genocide get arrested by the van load.
Tommy Robinson, born Stephen Yaxley-Lennon, a name he hides like a coward and likes to call himself a patriot. He wraps himself in the Union Jack, bellows about defending British values, and plays the working-class lad sticking two fingers up to the establishment. Scratch the surface and what do you find? Not a patriot. Not a defender of Britain. Not a champion of the working class. Instead, you find a career criminal, a race-baiting demagogue, a man bankrolled by the US alt-right, and a cheerleader for Israel’s genocidal slaughter in Gaza.
A patriot fights for the people of their country. Robinson fights against them against Muslims, against immigrants, against the working class itself. He doesn’t want to see a fairer Britain; he wants to divide it, poison it, and hand it over to foreign billionaires who bankroll his every stunt. That’s not patriotism. That’s betrayal. A short arsed cunt with a cock the size of one of those pencils they have in a betting shop. Twat.
The coward in a flag
Let’s deal first with his image. Robinson likes to swagger around in Union Jack clobber, as if draping yourself in red, white and blue makes you Churchill reborn. He might like a ruck, but he’s a short-arsed, insecure fascist twat who hides his cowardice behind noise, violence, and mob rule.
Every time Robinson bangs on about 'our country', what he really means is his country a white, Christian-only Britain that never existed outside of the wet dreams of fascists. This is not patriotism; it’s nostalgia for a Britain that was always a fiction, a fantasy rooted in empire and racial supremacy. Twat.
Laurence Fox and Hatey Kopkins marching with Tommeh: Fascist Andy Saxon at the rear.
Patriotism for Sale: The Steve Bannon Connection
If Robinson was truly a patriot, he’d defend Britain from foreign interference. Instead, he’s bought and sold by the US alt-right. Steve Bannon, former Trump aide and fascist Svengali, saw in Robinson a useful idiot: a thuggish mouthpiece who could inject American-style white nationalism into the British bloodstream.
Robinson took the money, the platform, the training, all the strings pulled by Washington backers. He went from being a two-bit thug in Luton to an international figure of the far-right because Bannon and his ilk pumped dollars into his cause. That’s not patriotism. That’s treachery.
Patriots defend their country from foreign control. Robinson opens the door to it, grinning like a useful stooge. He’s less Churchill, more Vichy collaborator, a British Quisling in a Stone Island jacket. Twat.
Robinson’s grift has always been bankrolled by forces outside Britain. American billionaires, Zionist lobbyists, and shady crypto-fascist networks have poured cash into his pockets. Why? Because he serves their agenda: to weaken Britain by turning worker against worker, Muslim against non-Muslim, immigrant against native-born. He doesn’t campaign for decent wages, for council housing, for the NHS, for unions. He campaigns for division. He wants working-class communities looking sideways in suspicion at their neighbours instead of upwards at the bosses and landlords who are actually shafting them.
The Americans know this. Steve Bannon knows this. Israel knows this. Robinson is just their attack dog, snarling on command, always ready to bark at Muslims while the real thieves empty Britain’s pockets. Twat.
And live from the US - Steve Bannon, Fascist. None of these cunts can say they aren't far-right now. Own your shit
The Gaza Connection: A Patriot for Genocide
Let’s talk about Robinson’s love affair with Israel. He paints himself as a 'defender of Judeo-Christian civilisation' which is code for 'defender of apartheid and genocide'. Robinson has cheered Israel’s bombing campaigns, shrugged off the murder of Palestinian children, and smeared anyone who dares to speak up for Palestine as 'terrorist sympathisers'. A patriot would stand against genocide. Robinson stands with it. He waves the Israeli flag alongside his Union Jack, like some grotesque hybrid of fascist nationalism and colonial brutality. He doesn’t give a toss about British sovereignty or independence: his loyalty is to whichever state is currently slaughtering Muslims. When Israel starves Gaza, Robinson cheers. When children die under rubble, Robinson posts memes about Hamas and and he has the gall to call himself a patriot? No. He’s a genocide apologist, a propaganda stooge, a man whose moral compass is so warped he’d rather stand with Netanyahu than with British people marching for peace. Twat.
Tommeh, on an Israeli tank, in Israel. Not funded at all by these murdering cunts.
The Working-Class Betrayal
Robinson likes to brand himself as a working-class lad from Luton who 'speaks for the people'. Hang on a minute. What does he really offer working people? Not jobs. Not houses. Not hospitals. Just hatred. Every time Robinson whips up a mob, the same people win: landlords, bosses, and billionaires, because while the working class are brawling in the streets over who’s more British, the real ruling class are laughing all the way to the bank. The hedge fund managers, the private equity vultures, the politicians in bed with corporations think Tommy Robinson is gold. Robinson has never organised a strike. He’s never defended a picket line. He’s never stood with nurses, teachers, or rail workers. His only working-class politics is to divide the working class against itself. That’s not patriotism; it’s betrayal of the very people he pretends to represent. Twat.
Criminality and Thuggery
Patriotism is about service, sacrifice, duty. Robinson’s record is about crime, fraud, and violence. He’s been nicked for assault, mortgage fraud, football hooliganism. He's got a a rap sheet longer than a Boris Johnson lie. His entire life has been one long hustle: lie, rile up a mob, get arrested, cry political persecution, collect donations. Repeat ad nauseam. That’s not a patriot. That’s a conman. And like all conmen, he doesn’t care who he screws over so long as the grift pays out. Twat.
Imported Fascism in a British Accent
Robinson likes to pretend he’s a homegrown voice of Britain but his entire politics is imported: American-style culture wars, Israeli-style Islamophobia, European fascist cosplay. There’s nothing authentically British about him in the slightest. Britain’s true patriotic traditions are Chartism, the trade union movement, the Suffragettes, the anti-fascists of Cable Street, the miners’ strikes, the NHS. Robinson stands against every single one of those. His lineage isn’t British patriotism; it’s Oswald Mosley’s Blackshirts, Hitler’s brownshirts, and Mussolini’s thugs. Twat.
Twat
The Fear and the Grift
At bottom, Robinson is driven by two things: fear and money. Fear of a world he can’t control, a world where his little England fantasy is crumbling and money. Money, the endless grift that turns his fear into profit. He’s not brave. He’s not principled. He’s not patriotic. He’s a frightened little man, desperately flogging himself as a brand, turning hatred into clicks and donations, hiding his cowardice behind bravado. Twat.
The Final Word: Not a Patriot, Just a Twat
So let’s say it plainly, Teeny tiny Tommy ten names is not a patriot. He’s a short-arsed fascist twat, a conman for hire, a coward wrapped in a flag, a cheerleader for genocide, and a puppet for foreign billionaires. He divides the working class, betrays the traditions of British struggle, and sells out his country to the highest bidder. True patriots build, defend, and unite. Robinson destroys, betrays, and divides. And for all his posturing, all his shouting, all his strutting about with flags and meathead security, history will remember him for what he really is: not a defender of Britain, but a parasite feeding on its wounds. Tommy Robinson is a twat. He knows he's a twat and everyone except his hard of thinking supporters think he's a twat. And they're all twats too.
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